Obituary for Sara Kettler Friend
Sara Kettler Friend, 59, of Montclair, New Jersey, passed away on April 3, 2023, after a brave 6-year bout
with ALS. She died peacefully in her sleep at home with family by her side.
Sara was born on May 7, 1963, to Bernard and Marie Kettler, at Holy Name Hospital in Teaneck, NJ. She
grew up in Woodcliff Lake where she excelled at pretty much everything she set her mind to. Sara “the
slugger” in softball. Sara “the speedy” in swimming. Sara “the ace server” in tennis. Sara “the singer” in
theater and choir. Sara “the student.” And ultimately, Sara “the sweet” to all of her classmates, family,
relatives, and friends.
Sara was, and still is, beloved by all, with an infectious – and very loud – laugh, a razor-sharp mind that
vanquished thousands of NY Times crosswords, an encyclopedic memory dating back to her toddler days,
and a dry sense of humor that was delivered deadpan, yet left all in stitches.
After graduating from Pascack Hills High School in 1981, she went on to graduate with honors from Rollins
College in Winter Park, Florida, where she was a universally-loved sister and past-president of the Chi
Omega sorority.
From a young age, Sara’s choice in work said a lot about her character. Whether it was being the go-to
babysitter, a trusted lifeguard, baker of the best darn cookies and cakes in town, insurance wizard at
Travelers, or luxury innkeeper at The Swag, Sara collected a vast array of skills that served her well as a
wife and mother and secured her the unofficial title of “CEO of Worldwide Logistics” for the family.
In 1995, Sara met Pier Friend over a game of golf with friends. Their first date was a friendly game of tennis
in Manhattan, NY. After a courtship that included many sets on the court and rounds on the links, they were
married on October 3, 1998.
In 2000, they had a son, Wilson (22). Three years later, they added a daughter, Genevieve (20). Having
officially outgrown their Manhattan apartment, the Friend family moved to Montclair, New Jersey, where
they still call home.
Athletic genes run strong in the family, so as Wil and Eve grew, they kept Sara on her toes. She was up the
task. Sara was a devoted soccer, baseball, softball and track and field mom. She didn’t bat an eye when the
kids needed to travel to a tournament anywhere on the eastern seaboard, or beyond. When it came to
sports, Sara was game. And her game was tennis.
By modest family estimations, Sara won “a lot” of tennis events. Her competitive spirit applied the same to
singles, doubles and mixed doubles. She enjoyed competing at the Bradford Bath & Tennis Club in
Montclair as well as with her tennis community in Wainscott, New York, where she vacationed with her
family.
Yet as much as a Sara loved winning, she loved her family more. Today, her greatest trophies are proudly
on display in every room of her home – framed photos of Sara smiling with her husband, children, mom,
dad, brother, sister, relatives, friends, and pets.
Sara was predeceased by her dad, Bernard, niece Kate Kettler, and her mother and father in-laws Elizabeth
and Theodore Friend. She is survived by her mother, Marie, husband Pier, son Wil, daughter Eve, dog
Teddy, siblings Marigene Behrens (Mark) and Tom Kettler (Julie), sister-in-law Timmie Friend Haskins
(Scott), brother-in-law Tad Friend (Amanda Hesser) and nieces & nephews Hannah Kettler, Addison and
Walker Friend and Lucia Haskins.
Services will be held 12:30 on Saturday, April 15, at Immaculate Conception Church in Montclair. In lieu of
flowers, Sara requested donations be made to the Eleanor and Lou Gehrig ALS Center
In lieu of flowers, donate to:
Eleanor and Lou Gehrig ALS Center - https://www.alscenter.cuimc.columbia.edu/make-gift
Team Gleason Foundation - https://teamgleason.org/donate/
The ALS Association - https://donate.als.org/give/287064/#!/donation/checkout?c_src=jumppage
Visiting Friday April 14th from 4-8pm at Caggiano Memorial.
Funeral Mass Saturday April 15 , 12:30pm at immaculate Conception Church, 30 North Fullerton Ave, Montclair. Repast to immediately follow the mass at Madonna Hall, located below the church chapel.
with ALS. She died peacefully in her sleep at home with family by her side.
Sara was born on May 7, 1963, to Bernard and Marie Kettler, at Holy Name Hospital in Teaneck, NJ. She
grew up in Woodcliff Lake where she excelled at pretty much everything she set her mind to. Sara “the
slugger” in softball. Sara “the speedy” in swimming. Sara “the ace server” in tennis. Sara “the singer” in
theater and choir. Sara “the student.” And ultimately, Sara “the sweet” to all of her classmates, family,
relatives, and friends.
Sara was, and still is, beloved by all, with an infectious – and very loud – laugh, a razor-sharp mind that
vanquished thousands of NY Times crosswords, an encyclopedic memory dating back to her toddler days,
and a dry sense of humor that was delivered deadpan, yet left all in stitches.
After graduating from Pascack Hills High School in 1981, she went on to graduate with honors from Rollins
College in Winter Park, Florida, where she was a universally-loved sister and past-president of the Chi
Omega sorority.
From a young age, Sara’s choice in work said a lot about her character. Whether it was being the go-to
babysitter, a trusted lifeguard, baker of the best darn cookies and cakes in town, insurance wizard at
Travelers, or luxury innkeeper at The Swag, Sara collected a vast array of skills that served her well as a
wife and mother and secured her the unofficial title of “CEO of Worldwide Logistics” for the family.
In 1995, Sara met Pier Friend over a game of golf with friends. Their first date was a friendly game of tennis
in Manhattan, NY. After a courtship that included many sets on the court and rounds on the links, they were
married on October 3, 1998.
In 2000, they had a son, Wilson (22). Three years later, they added a daughter, Genevieve (20). Having
officially outgrown their Manhattan apartment, the Friend family moved to Montclair, New Jersey, where
they still call home.
Athletic genes run strong in the family, so as Wil and Eve grew, they kept Sara on her toes. She was up the
task. Sara was a devoted soccer, baseball, softball and track and field mom. She didn’t bat an eye when the
kids needed to travel to a tournament anywhere on the eastern seaboard, or beyond. When it came to
sports, Sara was game. And her game was tennis.
By modest family estimations, Sara won “a lot” of tennis events. Her competitive spirit applied the same to
singles, doubles and mixed doubles. She enjoyed competing at the Bradford Bath & Tennis Club in
Montclair as well as with her tennis community in Wainscott, New York, where she vacationed with her
family.
Yet as much as a Sara loved winning, she loved her family more. Today, her greatest trophies are proudly
on display in every room of her home – framed photos of Sara smiling with her husband, children, mom,
dad, brother, sister, relatives, friends, and pets.
Sara was predeceased by her dad, Bernard, niece Kate Kettler, and her mother and father in-laws Elizabeth
and Theodore Friend. She is survived by her mother, Marie, husband Pier, son Wil, daughter Eve, dog
Teddy, siblings Marigene Behrens (Mark) and Tom Kettler (Julie), sister-in-law Timmie Friend Haskins
(Scott), brother-in-law Tad Friend (Amanda Hesser) and nieces & nephews Hannah Kettler, Addison and
Walker Friend and Lucia Haskins.
Services will be held 12:30 on Saturday, April 15, at Immaculate Conception Church in Montclair. In lieu of
flowers, Sara requested donations be made to the Eleanor and Lou Gehrig ALS Center
In lieu of flowers, donate to:
Eleanor and Lou Gehrig ALS Center - https://www.alscenter.cuimc.columbia.edu/make-gift
Team Gleason Foundation - https://teamgleason.org/donate/
The ALS Association - https://donate.als.org/give/287064/#!/donation/checkout?c_src=jumppage
Visiting Friday April 14th from 4-8pm at Caggiano Memorial.
Funeral Mass Saturday April 15 , 12:30pm at immaculate Conception Church, 30 North Fullerton Ave, Montclair. Repast to immediately follow the mass at Madonna Hall, located below the church chapel.